How I have been Disciplined

Because sometimes Capital Punishments can create a rift between Parents and Child, one that can never be filled

Note: This is not related to my book. Just a fleeting thought I penned.

It was nothing new for me,
When my father hit me,
I had been disciplined since childhood,
With sticks and brooms and slaps and kicks too,
That was my parents style of venting out their anger,
And rearing the elder kid too.

I grew apart from them with time,
They never understood why I rebelled,
As I reached my teens I started losing my cool,
So it was nothing new for me,
When my father hit me.

I reached my twenties,
I found a partner and as he went through a harsh phase,
I wanted to be there for him, listening to him into the night,
It was something my father couldn’t digest,
At the age of twenty four,
It was again nothing new for me,
When my father took a stick and hit me,
I protested and I shoved him back, my mother called me crazy,
After all hitting back is not how I have been disciplined.

More than a year later I can still see the marks upon my waist,
A reminder of that ill fated day,
What had been my fault?
Was it wrong to be there for someone you love?
But then parents can do no wrong,
They have always reared us with so much love,
So I am not allowed to question them,
Or tell others the very same, what would society think of them?
And anyways also I should have been used to it,
Why would I even cry over this common occurrence?
After all it was nothing new for me,
When my father hit me,
It is just how I have been disciplined.


All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar.

The Soul’s Urge©|2020

Published by

Vanya Rajwar

An Alpha by sight but a lone wolf by right. Eternally and Devastatingly romantic. Not 'sugary' but dark and tormented. A furore of passion and the despair of an idealism not realised. An Ambivert; my calm demeanour hides the raging storm of emotions inside. A Freelance Writer; expressing emotions through words.

8 thoughts on “How I have been Disciplined”

  1. Not an interesting childhood. I lost my father at Age 12 and never could forgive all the black and blue beatings I had for even the silliest of mistakes. He was a Bean counter. Once I stole 6 Naye paise and Ek Anna from his box. This was to be for my small shop selling sweet candies which I could sell for profit. I was 9. Year was 1962. Profit was to be earned for giving to National Defence Fund as we were at War with China. I did not utter being disciplined and beaten black and blue by both my father and teacher mom. And one day I told them – I contributed a whole 10 Rupees to NDF from that “Stolen” kid philanthropist entrepreneur – but no I was not appreciated as the money was ill gotten. I could relate to your poetry with nostalgia. In my living memory, I have hit my daughters one slap each to date, and as a father I still repent it as they have a bad memory they can’t erase. Warm regards. Keep writing your wonderful stories and poems. Jay

    1. Glad you could relate. Yours is a really nice story. In my experience Capital punishments are never the solution since each child is different and I guess parents fail to understand that. Some memories can’t be forgotten however much parents do for us. What might have been a small thing for them may have had a huge impact on a growing mind and if it comes when you are an adult it usually ends up in driving a wedge which might heal but the cracks can never be erased.

  2. Sad to know that you had to face beating from your parents.
    In my opinion, beating a child should be the last option in the book to exercise when every means to correct the child fails. And blind obedience is not the “ideal” behaviour which is expected of the child. Things might be resolved through talks or negotiations.
    Still, hitting parents is also not good. After all parents usually sacrifice a lot to help educate their children so that they can become better human beings.

    1. I won’t call it sad since in a way it made me a stronger individual, I can handle pain better than most of my counterparts.
      But yes as you grow old the anger simmers within and some issues can not be resolved overtime.
      Exactly my point, they sacrifice a lot but hitting your kid who is in their mid 20s does not count as healthy especially since by this time young adults have the right to live their own lives. But this poem is half inspired from me and half from my observation of others. Each child is different and has his/her own opinions.

      1. You are very much right Madam.. Each child is different and beating them is not healthy or a “right” of the parents by virtue of their “sacrifice” towards their children.
        There are other ways to grow stronger. Tragedy isn’t one of them.
        Hope you don’t have to face it again..!!

      2. True that. I am sure I won’t.
        And I hope will have much healthier parenting habits and probably dissuade other parents from using capital punishments as a way to discipline their children.

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