WHERE IS CHAOS?

2018-05-24-13-44-10-279-e1527259237927.jpg
“A Bizzare Tale of the Dreamland”

It was a weird dream I saw,

Today in the morning at four.

There was a small black panther traversing my dreamland,

I caught him and covered him with a cloth;

I wanted to protect him from this brutal world.

There was a bridge which I carried him across,

Cradled in my arms like a baby,

I just wanted to take him home.

There were policemen standing at the bridge’s end,

And they wouldn’t let me into the main city,

With anything suspicious in hand,

I had no other option  but to tell them the whole scene,

I was going to but somehow he slipped out of my grasp.

He entered the city and created a lot of hue and cry,

I ran after him remembering I had sworn to protect him,

I found him running for his life afraid of the din and noise,

I caught him by the neck and cradled him again,

As I took him home that night.

A weirder scene met me at home,

My mother was cooking in the kitchen,

And a tigress was polishing her nails sitting at the door;

My mother treated it like it had always existed,

And I paid it as much attention as I do to my pet dogs.

I brought the Panther inside and named him CHAOS,

Due to the furore created by him,

Amongst the people of the city.

I caressed my other pets and  went to get food for Chaos;

A bizarre sight awaited me when I reached the kitchen,

The tigress was licking her well painted nails,

And the color was a bright red.

She also wore studs and a necklace,

Which shone in the luminous light of the kitchen bulb.

I found some milk for Chaos and with a bowl in hand,

I went in search for him but nowhere was he found,

I searched inside and outside but I had lost him,

At the end I was all stricken and panicked,

I was still asking,

“Where is Chaos?”

By this time I woke up from this vivid dream,

But it was stuck in my head the whole day.

Trying to make sense out of this fantastical dream,

The question still revolves in my head,

A sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach and my heart in flutters,

Whenever I ask, “Where is Chaos?”

 

All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar.

The Soul’s Urge©|2018

 

 

 

 

 

THE POINT

IMG_20180501_232644
“A Satirical Tale about the Point whence I stopped believing in Eternal Love”

I am tired of pleading people to love me,

The realisation that my real self does not interest them,

has finally dawned on me.

All I want right now is for all these men;

to let me be.

I tried loving once,

it was a puppy love, the kind you fall in at school,

it seemed so pure and true.

It ended when I realised that he was a dunce,

Besides me, there were three others in the lieu.

Oh the perils of love!!

Never will I love again, I took an oath that day;

but then time passes and things tend to change,

And I wasn’t able to keep things at bay.

I fell in love again, the shock came,

when I read his status on facebook one day,

stating he was gay.

He ended things on this note with me;

how cruel and deceptive can this world be,

I realised to my utter dismay.

No! No! No! I absolutely won’t love again,

I kept reminding myself after this instance,

as I fought with the pain.

But God’s work was not over with me,

and love crept up yet again;

My resistance, well, it was all in vain.

To this man I gave my all,

In hopes that he might stay;

it all ended in a debacle,

as another woman made his attention stray away,

so its obvious I had to leave him anyway.

I grew up with time,

All these love flings, I felt, were lessons of life.

I was in search for stability when I stumbled upon a person,

who I felt would be, worth the while.

I was happy and felt wanted,

after years of yearning;

But I guess I should have known better,

after all the years of learning.

His confusion and instable mind,

unnerved me to no extent.

I knew I was a prize,

At the end’ I had to quit;

I couldn’t stay with someone,

unsure about me.

I had finally decided I won’t look back,

then a person came and tried to heal me.

Heaven knows he was shattered more than me,

yet he made me laugh and smile.

He reasoned with his tact,

I knew he wasn’t over his latter love;

As he tried to rescue me I could sense his broken heart,

He needed the healing more than I did.

Despite having read it all,

I fell for him without refrain;

I tried hard not to but he had me chained.

I was shackled in his snares but this time round,

I knew better than to share.

This was the POINT, where come what may;

I knew I won’t love someone who treated me as a second choice,

someone with whom my inner self I couldn’t bare.

The point at which I could tolerate the ignorance,

bear the pain of separation, miss my whole existence,

but bowing down to someone who didn’t care

was worse than the pain of the cold shoulders and angry glares.

It was the point when I wanted to be with someone,

not for the avarice but for the romance;

Someone who would love my actual soul and not the facades I wear on a daily roll,

Someone who had the balls to accept me and never be deceitful towards me on the whole.

It was the point whence I knew without err that if a man couldn’t handle me,

fair and square,

then he didn’t deserve me at all.

My tryst with myself would continue for a lifetime,

even if such a man did not come my way,

this I forswear.

All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar.

The Soul’s Urge©|2018