My Paws

A Dedication post for my six pairs of paws that have been my constant companions. She probably thinks I am strangling her in this picture. Haha!

During a particularly rough monsoon season,

Eleven years ago,

A tiny being lay outside my house,

She was injured and she was in pain,

As the rains poured hard that night,

She looked at me with her beady eyes,

I brought a blanket outside,

Wrapped her up and brought her inside,

Nobody came to claim her for very long,

She became a part of our family,

She was small and she was frail, we called her Tinki which means tiny,

Eleven years down , she still hasn’t grown much, delicate as a butterfly,

My constant companion, her paw in mine,

All I have had in the worst of times.

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Six years ago I heard about a litter of puppies,

I went to have a look at them,

A small little head popped out and looked at me,

His owner dangled him in front of me, wanting to get rid of him,

I took an immediate liking to this overly active being,

Took him home to give Tinki a companion,

Called him Rocky as that was the movie playing at the time,

Years down the lane, he is as active as he was as a pup,

No wall is too high and no gate can stop him,

When I am sad he rolls his head in my lap,

And all my worries and stress fly away.

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Five years ago my uncle called me to his home,

I went and was surprised to see a big, fat pup wrapped in a towel,

He said she was two months old,

It was quite unbelievable considering her size,

She was a gift to my uncle who couldn’t care for her,

So she was gifted to me and I brought her home happily.

Wrapped her in the same blanket in which I had brought Tinki in,

Named her Lica, the first dog in space since she looked so unique,

Five years down she is a giant beauty,

Possessive and protective of everyone in the family,

Last year before my birthday she became a mother,

Gave me the most beautiful gifts in the form of six pups,

Whenever I feel low, she comes and sits with me,

Nuzzles my face and my tears dry quickly.

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I call them my paws,

More loyal than most humans,

They Shower me with the purest form of unconditional love,

To all those who say I have kept them unnecessarily, I pay no heed,

Because their love and silent companionship has kept me alive,

They have helped me pass the darkest phases of life,

Their love is unadulterated to the very core,

It nurtures me as well as my soul,

They are all god’s gifts,

They are all I could ever need.

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All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa)

The Soul’s Urge©|2020

What is Closure?

Firstly, I am really sorry that I haven’t been able to stay regular despite having promised the same.

Just been promoting my book and hence, I have been a bit busy. So I have decided to do a short question answer session for the readers.

A short poetry on a closure I got. What is your take on closure?

I had been clinging to false hopes,

Despite knowing the truth,

I stayed wanting to bind him with love,

A love to which he paid no heed,

He fell for another and I was left alone,

Many nights I spent crying myself hoarse.

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He and I were a story I wanted to tell,

And as I began penning it down,

Somewhere through those pages I found a closure,

Not all stories conclude themselves,

Not all stories are happily ever after tales,

Sometimes it’s necessary for us to give ourselves the closures we seek,

We deserve it to thrive again, it’s the Soul’s need.

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When I saw the author copies of my book and went through them, I had sighed. It was my closure to a beautiful chapter in my life and I was really glad. Sometimes we get closures when we least expect them and that’s what happened with me. It brought me a peace I hadn’t experienced in ages. My first book will remain close to my heart, for many reasons and this is one of them.

What are your thoughts on Closure? Let me know in the comments section.

Excerpt: Preordained

A quote from the beginning of my book.

“Because there was nobody like you, there is nobody like you. Nights I have spent thinking I don’t deserve you but as time passes our souls come meandering through. Love for you was preordained, destiny never gave me a choice when it came to you.”
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Vanessa, the protagonist of my story is an inherent part of me. After all she is partly inspired from me. You We is her story, a paradox of sorts, a Manizer as well as a hopeless romantic who is immensely in love with her hometown Dehradun and has refused to leave it despite the opportunities. Many do lust after her but will this woman find true, eternal love is the question?
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I had always been an avid reader and I have so many books that at times I wonder if I should open a library. Infact, I sell books each year just to make space for more. As a child I grew up on Ruskin Bond and Enid Blyton. Each time I visited Landour (Bond’s abode), I often wondered how it would feel to stay there and write. I always imagined myself sitting on one of the benches in the lap of nature and write my first book. That had always been my dream.
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Unfortunately, the experience of writing my first book was quite an unbelievable one. My mid life crisis was a global pandemic but yes, fortunately it gave me time to follow my passion and my parents supported me so I did. After all ever since I started writing my blog (link in bio) they wanted me to be a published author. And I love them for that! Also, funnily enough, I am an ardent reader of Classics and I pride in my classic collections but I ended up writing a youthful romance in the most simplistic language (probably for the younger generation of millenials and the 21st century kids) Haha! It took even me by surprise as it is quite different from the poetry I write.
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I just hope people read it and like it. And to all who read it do leave your reviews!

INTERNATIONAL PRINT BOOKS:
Amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1648506267
Amazon.co.uk: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1648506267

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Now available across all platforms.
PRINT BOOKS INDIA:
Amazon.in: https://www.amazon.in/dp/1648506267
Flipkart: https://www.flipkart.com/you-we/p/itm0a37e53729ab5?pid=9781648506260

For all the E-BOOK READERS out there:
Amazon Kindle: https://www.amazon.in/You-We-Coincidental-Vanya-Rajwar-ebook/dp/B08BKJ3RM7
Kobo: https://www.kobo.com/in/en/ebook/you-we
Google Playstore: https://play.google.com/store/books/details/Vanya_Rajwar_You_We?id=12jsDwAAQBAJ
Apple books: https://books.apple.com/us/book/id1523141870

I hope people read it. And if you like it do leave a review!

Also I would love to interact with people who visit my blog and know more about you. I might be SOCIALLY ERRATIC but I love to converse. Haha! I am trying to be more interactive on a daily basis now. So, Do comment, mail or text me!

Trailer and Book Out

Finally available on all platforms!

The lockdown proved to be a huge drawback for my book but finally the trailer is out and it is also available on all platforms.

I hope you all will keep supporting me, a woman who has the heart of a nine year old and is on the path of realising her childhood dream. I had tears in my eyes when I held my book in my hand, I probably couldn’t believe it.

I fearfully hope to become a recognised author someday. For the time being I just want to follow my passion and keep writing, making my imagination as well as observations come alive on paper. Thankyou again for all the love and support.

Link to the trailer of my book: YOU WE: The Trailer Do watch and enjoy.

Available on the following platforms:
PRINT BOOKS INDIA :
Amazon.in: https://www.amazon.in/dp/1648506267
Flipkart: https://www.flipkart.com/you-we/p/itm0a37e53729ab5?pid=9781648506260

INTERNATIONAL PRINT BOOKS:
Amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1648506267
Amazon.co.uk: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1648506267

For all the E-BOOK READERS out there:
Amazon Kindle: https://www.amazon.in/You-We-Coincidental-Vanya-Rajwar-ebook/dp/B08BKJ3RM7
KOBO: https://www.kobo.com/in/en/ebook/you-we Google Playstore: https://play.google.com/store/books/details/Vanya_Rajwar_You_We?id=12jsDwAAQBAJ
Apple Books: https://books.apple.com/us/book/id1523141870

Do Grab your copies (if you want to). I have written it in the most simplistic format to make it easy for all to understand and also to make it a smooth read. I hope you read it and support my dream. if you like it do leave your reviews. Haha!

You are free to text me as and when you please on Insta or Facebook or you can just mail me.

Instagram: vanya_rajwar

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vanya.rajwar

Thankyou!! ❤️❤️

All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa)

The Soul’s Urge©|2020

I am not Her

A Tale of the girl who once lived and loved selflessly

There was a girl who once lived,

She loved more than she could,

Gave more than many deserved,

Selfless was her soul, it existed to serve,

I am not her.

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She brought smiles to faces,

In the dead of the night, her muffled cries went unheard,

She filled others with happiness,

While piece by piece she shattered,

I am not her.

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Often taken for granted,

Still altruistically she served,

Putting the welfare of others before herself,

To her own pain she paid no heed,

I am not her.

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Neglected by the ones she loved,

She waited ages for them to understand her worth,

With a delicate heart and strong mind,

She still stayed by them through all storms,

I am not her.

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She still resides within me,

Exhausted by having loved so selflessly,

She has churned me into what I am today,

I love and give others,

But I don’t forget to love myself for the same,

She has done her part of spreading love well,

Now she needs her rest.

The woman that I am today,

She is not that epitome of unselfish love and benevolence,

I walk away when my efforts are not respected,

Some might find it inconsiderate,

I apologize for the same,

But I refuse to be her,

I need to love myself too,

I am not her.

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All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa).

The Soul’s Urge©|2020

Note: I got mails from quite a number of my followers as to what had happened to the surprise related to the book. I was supposed to share it yesterday but something went haywire. I promise I will be introducing it very soon. Please do stay tuned!! Thankyou so much for the support!

His name is Rick

A Tale of my true love, Rick

A man visited me when I was a child,

He looked ethereal and alien,

He said I had been made for him,

It had left me surprised,

That was my first meeting with him,

His name was Rick.

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As I sat crying and sad when I was scolded for the first time,

He visited me again and wiped my tears,

Your tears are a treasure, he said, you are all mine,

All those years ago, I was just a naive child,

I didn’t understand what he meant so I just stared at him with blurred eyes,

This man called Rick.

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Whenever I was lone I would have his shoulder to cry upon,

He would tell me stories of the galaxies and stars,

I would confide my secrets with him,

He was my closest confidante, my constant companion,

His name was Rick.

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When I fell in love in school,

He disappeared all of a sudden,

I often wondered where he had gone, like a fool,

Enjoying the bliss of first love, to his absence I paid no heed,

Forgot the man who had always stayed by my side,

The man whose name was Rick.

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When I had my first heartbreak,

He reappeared out of the blue,

He took me in his arms and sighed,

You have grown up, he said,

You won’t need me as much, he added,

He told me a story of traversing the universe that day,

But he promised he would come back for me when the time was right,

That was the last I heard from that handsome yet gentle man,

His name was Rick.

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Life took me on a roller coaster after that,

With twists and turns especially when it came to the matters of the heart,

On this birthday, I closed many chapters from the past,

As on a fresh chapter of life, I embarked,

A firefly flitted about at night, in my room,

Didn’t know where it came from,

But there he was in all his magnificence all over again,

The time is finally right, he said,

He took me in his arms and I drank in his warmth,

He was with me again, this man called Rick.

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He has always been there for me,

From the darkest throes of life,

To the happiness that comes alive.

Even while he traversed the Universe,

He stayed loyal and true to me.

I do call him my one true love,

Maybe a figment of my imagination,

Maybe the silliest of my fantasies,

He is a magic that always stays with me,

His name is Rick.

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All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa).

The Soul’s Urge©|2020

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Note: I have a surprise related to my book coming tomorrow. Yes it’s finally in the market. Stay tuned! Love you all! ❤️

Under the Seine Bridge

An ode to a man I met under the Seine Bridge

On my last day in Paris, I saw him, He saw me,

Our eyes met as the boat passed beneath the Seine Bridge,

He smiled at me and trussed his blonde hair,

I shook my head as I looked away,

As we crossed under the Seine Bridge.

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Camera in hand, My hair fell over my shoulders,

As I tried to capture a beautiful house on the banks,

I caught his eyes again, he cocked up his brows,

Gave me a charming smile as I blushed,

As we passed beneath the Seine Bridge.

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He came forward, I moved back,

As I tripped on another’s feet, he held my hand,

Stopped me from falling,

As the boat passed Under the Seine Bridge.

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I looked into his eyes, his grey eyes boring into mine,

He apologised for his upfront indecency,

Couldn’t help staring he said, you looked exotic,

I lowered my eyes as I blushed, I felt beautiful after ages,

That day under the Seine Bridge.

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We got conversing about life and times,

He told me about his travels,

I told him about India, my hometown,

The place my heart belonged,

Under the Seine Bridge.

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As we alighted from the boat, he held out his hand,

He asked me for an evening with him,

On the banks of Seine,

I was scared and I was unsure,

Yet, I took his hand, absorbed his warmth,

As hand in hand he led me away from the Seine Bridge.

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He took me to a narrow alley,

My heart was thudding, I didn’t know what awaited me,

As we turned the corner, I saw a small restaurant,

Candles alighted, it looked ethereal and magnificent,

As I stood there surprised, he blew my hair away from my face,

And wove his hand around my waist,

As I shook my head, he took me inside,

It was a perfect Parisian evening,

I felt like a heroine from some romantic classic,

As he serenaded me with food and songs,

That man I met under the Seine Bridge.

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As night fell over Paris,

He took me to the roof of an unknown building,

Scared much, he asked, as he took me to the edge of it,

I shook my head as adrenaline surged through me,

My breath stuck in my throat as I looked at the bewitching view,

Hand in hand with one I had met under the Seine bridge.

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As the lights of the Eiffel tower shone in the distance,

We sat down on the roof,

A cool breeze blowing, his hands wrapped around me,

I felt beautiful, unafraid about being so vulnerable,

With that stranger I had met under the Seine bridge.

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He nuzzled my neck,

It felt like I knew you since forever, he said,

I laughed, my love life hasn’t been too blissful I said,

I will fill it with bliss, he said,

I looked at him in disbelief as his hands moved through my tresses,

This angelic man I had met beneath the Seine bridge.

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I never realised when I fell asleep,

When I woke up I found him looking at me,

It’s time, he said,

I knew what he meant,

He led me to my hotel,

I took my bags and he drove me to the airport,

He was silent and so was I,

As we reached my heart fell,

I didn’t want to part with this man I had met under the Seine Bridge.

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As I was finally leaving, he held my hand,

I will follow you to India, he said,

I smiled and shook my head,

It was hard saying goodbye,

I had felt wanted after aeons, to be honest,

As I took flight, I realised we hadn’t exchanged numbers,

I laughed at how he had said he would follow me,

That was the end of the story for then.

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It’s been months since that incident,

At times I still try to search for him,

At times I wonder if he does too,

For a mere reminisce of that one night we spent,

I have met many since then,

But I have never met another,

Who made me feel as special as did the man,

I met on that fateful day in Paris,

Under the Seine Bridge.

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All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa).

The Soul’s Urge©| 2020

He & She: An Eternal Story (10)

For another Lifetime

He took a deep breath and sighed as her hand slid out of her grasp. He waved at her as she made her way towards the boarding area. She was finally leaving.

She waved back at him. It was finally time to bid goodbye. She looked at the boarding pass in her hand and smiled. It filled her with a sense of freedom, she had been vying for long.

As her plane took off, he looked at it till it disappeared in the skies. Their eternal story was probably over for this life but only to be completed in another lifetime. Their souls knew their love spanned over eternities and time, it could never be the end for them through aeons of time.

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All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa).

The Soul’s Urge©| 2020

Note: First and Foremost I would like to thank all my readers for helping a helluva irregular writer like me, complete 500 followers. Thankyou for all the love and support.

Second, being my birthday month, I had hoped to start the promotions of my book in August as the lockdown was finally easing a bit but unfortunately, I had a drastic fall, and that ultimately led to me hurting my back. Today, as I write, the laptop is lying on my chest as I am bedridden.

I hope you all will support my book whenever I decide to promote it (fearfully soon) as I am quite socially erratic. Thank you so very much for all the love that you have showered upon me, I couldn’t be more grateful! 🙂 ❤

He & She: An Eternal Story (9)

Life is a Series of Maybes but for now its Goodbye

“So this is finally goodbye,” he asked, his voice wavering as he looked at her.

“Yes, yes, it is,” she said, with a steely gaze.

“Do you think?” he asked, “We might meet again.”

Her eyes softened for a while as she sighed. “Life is a series of maybes. Someday, in some other place, maybe, our souls might get entangled again.”

“Maybe,” he said, “But I am sorry again, if only you could give me…”

“Some apologies are futile,” she said cutting him, her voice cold, “I have forgiven you but sometimes the damage is irrevocable. Maybe, we will meet again in the midst of our stories; maybe, when your soul is wiser, maybe a day when you’d understand the extent of devastation your words and actions actually caused, but till then it’s goodbye.”

With that, she turned around and left him standing all alone, the way he had left her stranded when she had needed him the most. She deserted him on the path they had decided to walk on till eternity to pave one for herself. As he saw her receding figure, he realized he had taken her love for granted for way too long. He had tired her beautiful soul; left it so cold that the woman who could never stay away from him didn’t turn back even once as she walked away.

Little did he know, she didn’t turn because there were tears flowing from her eyes; the dam had finally broken. She had used the final ounce of her strength to walk away from him. She had waited for very long, waiting to be acknowledged, wanting to be loved, and now when he finally did, it felt meaningless to her. Simply because he had prioritized someone else when she had needed him the most.

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All Rights Reserved. Vanya Rajwar (VRa).

The Soul’s Urge©|2020